it took until yesterday afternoon to make me feel like i have stepped out of the cave a little bit. i have been sick for 2 weeks (hello sinus infection...bye-bye, now, naw really - you can go), nursing my knee/leg that is still not 100% and more of a puzzle than a picture of health (a year and a half later...deeeeeep breath), and pull myself out of the weeds at work. stress levels have been high and when that happens, i notice self-care goes out the window and i merely just try and make it through to the next day. not a pretty picture. and when this happens, my optimism takes a hard hit.
so this weekend, i told j - "let's get some flowers and herbs and repot all of our containers." so armed with as many Kleenex packets as i could stuff in my purse, off we went.
there is something so peaceful about wandering up and down aisles covered with green, with splashes of color, varieties of leaves, and breathing with life. we chose some favorites. kai picked out his first plant to keep in his room and love and care for. we came home and walked down for lunch, meeting up with a good friend that i haven't seen much this winter and having her join us. we ate and basked in the sunshine. then we spent yesterday afternoon, hands in dirt. and for the first time in weeks, i felt the draft, the dampness, and the chill of the cave behind me. my face straining toward the sunshine.