a ray of sunshine, that is what you are, ryder. i am amazed at how fast time seems to be flying past us this second time around. i admit i haven't been as vigilant at recording in your book as i was when kai was young. but what i have been is completely, uber aware with you...to soak up, to relish and to savor every single moment of your baby time. i cannot seem to get enough. rather than cringe that it is past midnight and i have to be up in a few hours ~ and you have no intention of sleep at the moment ~ i simply lay my hand gently on your chest and as your hold onto my fingers i remind myself it is only a matter of a little while before you won't require my warmth to fall to sleep, so i share the warmth that brings me. and just when i think my day has been tough or life feels that pull of a challenge, you greet me with a mile wide smile, and i get lost in that moment and it grounds me, allowing anything else to scatter into the winds like the fuzzy seeds of a dandelion carrying wishes. it is your lesson and your gift. i find wisdom in your teeny fingers and bright eyes. i find peace in your little body as it curls around me in the evening when you drift off to dreams in my lap. and i find unimaginable love as i watch how protective and concerned your big brother is for you. ti amo, ryder. xoxo mama
